All posts in Jokes

Sindhi Boy

A young Sindhi boy from Pune goes off to college. Half way through the semester, having foolishly squandered all his money, he calls home.

"Pita ji," he says, "You won’t believe what modern education is developing! They actually have a program here in Indian Institute of Management, Ahmadabad (IIMA) that will teach our dog, Moti, how to talk!"

"That’s amazing," his father says. "How do I get Moti in that program?"

"Just send him down here with Rs 1,00,000" the young Sindhi boy says "and I’ll get him in the course."

So, his father sends the dog and Rs. 1,00,000.

About two-thirds of the way through the semester, the money again runs out. The boy calls home.

"So how’s Moti doing son?" his father asks.

"Awesome, Pita ji, he’s talking up a storm," he says, "but you just won’t believe this – they’ve had such good results they have started to teach the animals how to read!"

"Read!?" says his father, "No kidding! How do we get Moti in that program?"

"Just send Rs.2,00,000, I’ll get him in the class."

The money promptly arrives. But our hero has a problem.

At the end of the year, his father will find out the dog can neither talk, nor read. So he shoots the dog.

When he arrives home at the end of the year, his father is all excited.

"Where’s Moti? I just can’t wait to see him read something and talk!"

"Pita ji," the boy says, "I have some grim news. Yesterday morning, just before we left to drive home, Moti was in the living room, kicked back in the recliner, reading The Economic Times, like he usually does".

"Then Moti turned to me and asked, so, is your father still messing around with that little pretty Champa who lives down the street?"

The father went white and exclaimed, "I hope you shot that son of a bitch before he talks to your Mother!"

"I sure did, Pita ji!"

"That’s my boy!"

The kid went on to law school and now serves in New Delhi as a Member of Parliament.

Twenty Dollar

 

On their wedding night, the young bride approached her new  husband and asked for $20.00 for their first  lovemaking encounter. In  his highly aroused state, her husband readily agreed.

This scenario was repeated each time they made love, for more than 30 years, with him thinking that it was a cute way for her to afford new clothes and other incidentals that she needed.

Arriving home around noon one day, she was surprised to find her husband in a very drunken state. During the next few minutes, he explained that   his employer was going through a process of corporate down sizing, and he had been let go.

It was unlikely that, at the age of 59, he’d be able to find another job.

Calmly, his wife handed him a bank book which showed more than thirty years of steady deposits and interest totalling nearly$1 million.

Then she showed him certificates of deposits issued  by the bank which were worth over $2 million.

She explained that  she had ‘charged’ him for sex, and these were the  results of her savings and investments.

The husband was so astounded he could  barely speak. Finally he found his voice and blurted out, ‘If  I’d had any idea what you  were doing, I would have had sex only with you.’

That’s when she shot him.

You know, that’s what happens when you  don’t know when to keep your mouth shut…!!!